911 what is your EMERGENCY?

I have been a 911 operator in Florida for the past 15 years. During that time, I have heard all kinds of "EMERGENCIES" as you can imagine, some real, some not so much! The majority - not so much. We are the main public service answering point for the county in which I reside, which basically means we get all the calls for the county who dial 911 from their cell phone or from their residential phones who are not in the 4 incorportated cities in my county. We never know what kind of call we are going to get next, whether it be from a frantic mother who has lost her 2 year old, from a drunk who wants to know what time it is, my asnswer would be if not for the taped phone lines, time to get a watch! We get loads of "pocket calls" when that cell phone magically calls 911 from their pocket or their purse! When school is out we get calls from kids with nothing better to do than call 911 - where are the parents of these kids ?? We get plenty of calls from schools obviously from kids who are allowed to have their cell phones on in class.
While on a Thansgiving vacation with my family in Vermont recently, I was urged to start a blog on weird calls that I have received. This will serve as my blog for my many calls I have and will continue to have in my carreer as a 911 operator.